Archive for June, 2009

Ozstuff Online

Posted: June 30, 2009 in animals

In my own slightly (slightly??) pathetic way, the Quiz Man (’tis I, the Quizzler) is sending you, my faithful and long-time friend (and only person to visit my site since the Gulf War!), this very, very merry “Happy 4th of July” card….I know it’s a bit early, but I’m now working full-time on my “Happy Labor Day” card (September 7th or something like that—8th?) and am sore afraid that I will be working so intensely that I will forget to post my “Happy 4th!” greetings….Of course, considering that you are NOT from the United States, you probably don’t give a damn if I wish you a “Happy 4th!” or a “Happy Labor Day!”…..Just be that way!!….All of that work for nought (naught)!!….Well, at least this frees up my July and August!!…So thanks!!

Posted: June 30, 2009 in animals

Via my creative-to-a-fault (and to-a-virtue!) Stumbler friend, the Truly Remarkable Tindink (just look for her under “Tindink”—I just threw in the “Truly Remarkable” for color (and accuracy!)…..Two cartoon panels that are a microcosm of the World-Wide Greed Network (coming to a cable company near you!!)…..Very, very funny…..and very, very disturbing…..I laughed, then I cried….I wept, then I sighed….Tindink always brings out the deep-dark hidden part of me that is confused about laughing on the inside and crying on the outside….or is it laughing on the outside and crying on the inside??….Tindink’s pages are so imaginative and fun, fun, fun that they will confuse your inner darkness as well!!….Hop on over and take a peak!!

Posted: June 29, 2009 in animals

I can’t go on without posting yet another (yes, another—damn me!) Lady-in-Red….Model Mayhem’s her name, redhead is her game!!….Oh, I know how much you despise me for these Ladies-in-Red (one guy Stumbler—I think his name WAS “Guy” now that reflect—wrote to me and told me what a splendaciously splendiferous site I had EXCEPT for my obsession with the L’s in R—-a Guy wrote that—not a woman who might object to my posting too many lovely ladies instead of concentrating on the serious and profound in life, but a GUY—what a blow to my fragile redhead-obsessed ego!!….Oh well, what can I do about it…..I’m obsessed and their ain’t no cure for obsessions (oh, I know there are, but don’t go writin’ and tellin’ me all about dem cures cuz I dontz wanta hear it—-I want to live in my Fantasy World of Redness—-Otherwise I have to think about my credit card debt and there’s really nothing Fantasy World about that (no, not even the guys who they’ll send to break my kneecaps and sew my lips to my groin are a Fantasy—just had a neighbor, Zigbenic, who had that happen to him—-he couldn’t tell me about it, but he’s learned to do sign language—-although they said that next time they’ll come and break his arms and sew his foot to his forehead—-Guess I’d better “talk” to Ziggy while I still have the chance!!)….Damn me…go ahead…but lay off my redheads!

Posted: June 28, 2009 in animals

This is my step-cousin twice removed….name of Rose….She lost her job over at the county public library (sex and fashion section, usually, but occasionally to be found in the human biology and anatomy aisles) 6 months back and had been lookin’ and lookin’ and lookin’ for work since then (well, not 24/7, but 4 or 5/3)…..At first, she was lookin’ and lookin’ for something that would match her talents and prior employment history, but Bud’s Big-Mouth Burgers and Zelda Frenchbender’s Bridal Boutique weren’t hiring…..So then she was just lookin’ and lookin’ for a job that would allow her to take the night-course (11 p.m. to 2 a.m.) Sleep Deprivation Specialist classes over at New Holstein University Online….Well, she found the perfect job (did I tell you she’s attractive in a “red light district” sort of way and has great legs??) to keep her college dreams alive (and put some Pork Rind Salad on the table for her Banker husband, Bernie)…..She’s now the official mascot outside of Larry & Marceen’s Auto Body and Repair and Cheap Souvenir Shoppe over on Bikers Avenue….All she has to do is sit in this wrecked-to-pieces half-Dodge, half-Ford truck at the entry to the Shoppe to attract customers and chit-chat with the locals (Larry & Marceen hate chit-chatting with the locals so having someone to do that for them means a lot to them, even if they have to pay for it)…..Pay isn’t bad….$7 an hour plus all of the cheap souvenirs you can fit in your purse when your shift’s through….And business has never been better so Larry & Marceen are thinking of giving Rose a raise of sorts… allowing her to bring a bigger purse to work each work day!!!

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Posted: June 28, 2009 in animals

Snow White and Prince Charming were doing just fine (livin’ the Fairy Tale existence we all long to live) before the Crooks in the Financial Industries and the Government (or lack thereof) sent us into this damned “The Recession-Depression”…..Oh, and it didn’t help that, once they moved to Wisconsin, the Prince had turned out to be the “Average Wisconsin Beer-Drinkin’, All-Sports Watchin’, Bratwurst-Munchin’, Lazier-than-Lazy, Helplesser-than-Helpless, Totally Untalkative Male”…..Or that they’d had all of these kids they didn’t know how to take care of (after all, YOU try taking care of children after growing up as a Fairy Tale Princess and a Fairy Tale Prince Charming… don’t know squat about taking care of anything, not to mention a brood of “I want this, I want that” little brats)….Or that they’d gotten that kid-attack dog to help them care for the children (Gaggles, the kid-attack dog, is resting in this picture…resting after hours of herding and harrassing the chilluns)…..Or that Princey Boy had gotten a cushy job with Lehmann Brothers two weeks before they folded like a bad tent….Or that Snow White has not yet gotten the knack of changing her own clothes and buying new ones….so she’s still in the same outfit that she wore in the woods with those filthy little cretin elves all those months!!!

Nature taking it’s own photographs these days….And Nature is one hell of a photographer as this image attests…..”Smooth Rock Formations” by Claudia26 (which I think is the Wind??…Or is it the Waters??….Well, someone from the Nature’s Own Photo Studio)!!!….Nature does have to work on the names for it’s own photos and its photographers….A bit more imagination would be in order for such a seminal source of Imagination and Creativity!!!

As those of you who really frequent my pages a lot (all 13 of you….down from 17 last month….what the hell did I do wrong, huh??) know, I adore the paintings of Tamara de Lempicka……Another dazzler by her, “Portrait of Ira P”…..Not sure where Ira P is….Off painting I would guess…Downing a couple of Triple Martinis just before it’s time for the weekly Saturday Night at the Fights starring the Missus and Mr. Ira P……I have been known to be wrong, though…..Like the time I thought that my favorite office administrative assistant, Gustavus, was having an affair with my boss, Herr Demonicus (more of a description than his real name….to protect my innocence….and keep me employed for a few more months)…..Turned out my boss was having an affair with his wife…..He stayed home 3 Friday nights in a row….He hadn’t done that since ought-2 (2002 for those unschooled in the use of ought… me!)…..Apparently, the Missus, who looks a lot like perfectly-aged 40 year old Cindy Crawford (or is it Broderick??), had gone to Italy, Greece, and Spain several months back and come home with an assortment of homemade thongs she’d picked up in various small shops on rarely-visited homey streets and byways in said Italy, Greece, and Spain…..And, apparently, Herr Demonicus, unlike most of the male-ish populace, really, really, really likes things bought in small shops on rarely-visited homey streets and byways in foreign lands…..I don’t think it had anything to do with the thongishness of it all…..He just likes beautiful eensy-weensy pieces of expensive tightly-weaved cloth that women wear instead of underwear…..Whoda thunk the Herry D. was such a connoisseur of all things lovely and foreign???….Thanks to my great Stumbler friend and positively Master Class poster of the most interesting and fascinating art, Dobedobedo!!